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image MY DOCTOR TELLS MYTH: First sex is associated with pain and bleeding. COMMONEST WRONG BELIEF: There is pain initially. Pain subsides later on. Almost always you bleed during first sex.


Date last updated: March 05, 2016
Date published:
Date created: 2008
Be with the Best: Sexologist Dr. Ashok Koparday

Address: Samadhan India

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Last reviewed March 05, 2016

Bleeding Pain First Sex: Treatment Causes Pictures

In this chapter my doctor tells

Bleeding Pain First Sex:

(i) Every girl does not have bleeding and/or pain during first sex.
Not having bleeding/pain does not mean she is not a virgin.
(ii) Two common reasons for bleeding/pain during first sex are
A Hymen tear
B Vaginismus Vaginismus
What is hymen?
What is vaginismus?
Click here to know

How to avoid bleeding and/or pain during first sex?

Though I have said ‘first’ sex, actually this pain may remain for months or years.
So it is important to know how to do sexual intercourse without pain.

Medical terms:

Bleeding = Post coital bleeding
Pain = Dyspareunia

Bleeding Pain First Sex: Causes 1. Hymen Tear 2. Vaginismus


MYTH: First sex is associated with pain and bleeding.
COMMONEST WRONG BELIEF: There is pain initially. Pain subsides later on. Almost always you bleed during first sex.

Married girl asks sexologist

I’m 28 years marrried since 1 year. I have pain when husband tries to sexal intercourse. He becomes angry. I do not want to displease him. We are under pressuer to have a child. I too want pregnancy. I fear there will be bleeding and pain during sex.
I do not know what to do.
please guide.
Mrs. zzzz. xxx

Causes: Bleeding Pain First Sex

Pain and bleeding during first sex may be caused due to breaking of tough or rigid hymen or due to vaginismus. First sex instead of giving pleasure gives pain.
1. Hymen tear
2. Vaginismus

Bleeding Pain First Sex: 1 What is hymen?

Why hymen tear causes bleeding and pain during first sex

The external vaginal opening is covered by a thin elastic membrane called hymen.
Hymen is of various shapes. If you have menses it means your vaginal opening is partially covered by hymen.
After child birth the hymen is torn and remnant tags (carunculae myrtiformes) remain. This vaginal opening is called “parous introitus” as against “nulliparous introitus”.

Dr. Prakash Kothari’s dictum: Virginity v/s Chastity

A virgin was defined as a girl with intact hymen, which tears during first sex causing bleeding and pain. Now it is known that hymen tear can happen in a girl due to various reasons such as physical activities, examples being cycling, riding.
Chastity is good moral conduct. You are not having sex of any kind.
A girl may be virgin yet she may not be chaste.
Meaning she has done all sexual activities except insertion of penis in vagina.

Bleeding Pain First Sex:

Why hymen tear causes bleeding and pain during first sex

The hymen if elastic may easily allow passing of penis.
*** The hymen does not have nerve endings. So hymen does not have pain sensation.
Actually it is vaginismus that causes the pain and / or bleeding.


Girl Asks Sex Doctor

Hi Doctor,

I am 25 year old girl and married for last 1 and half yr. I want to ask a query regarding my sexual relationship with my husband.
Since the time we are married, we tried doing the intercourse, but every time it failed.

I am very much afraid of intercourse, as soon as he comes close and is about to insert i get tensed and tightened my legs, which pushes him back.
That makes him loose his temper and stops talking with me for sometime..
This fear could be one of the reason, we don’t try the intercourse regularly….hardly once or twice a month…
I have a fear that it would bleed badly…and hence i do not allow him to closer to me..
kindly advise how do i overcome this fear..since we are planning to have a baby by next year.
Thanks and Regards,
Mrs. xxx

MYTH: Bleeding Pain First Sex

During first sex there is always pain and bleeding.
This is ALL the knowledge about sex that 90.8% 80 % girls (who have not had premarital sex) have before marriage.
Female external genitalsAnatomy Female GenitalsExternal female genitals with names for sexual health education anatomy picture. Click to see hymen & vaginal introitus.


MEDICAL FACT: You can avoid bleeding and or pain first Sex

A girl Picture Female AnatomyPicture to know anatomical names of female external sex organs vulva, clitoris, vaginal and urethral opening need not at all have pain during first sexual intercourse. Sex is related to joy (anand) .


  1. Tear of tough hymen
  2. Vaginismus

Bleeding Pain First Sex: 1 What is vaginismus?

When the penis is thrust forcefully and the vaginal opening is shut by tightly clenching it leads to pain and bleeding. This experience can be avoided if the couple has correct knowledge & are comfortable about sex, especially first sexualSUHAGARATHoneymoon or first sex (Suhagarat) instead of giving pleasure can give pain. Read about what not to do during first sex intercourse.

When a girl anticipates pain it is this fear of pain that causes spasm of the pubococcygeus muscles that surround the vaginal opening. This contraction causes the opening to get clamped, forcefully shut, just as a baby would forcefully shut its mouth while refusing feeds. The door is closed. No entry.
The involuntary tightening of muscles around vagina causing the external vaginal opening to tightly shut is called vaginismus. Vaginismus is neither uncommon nor abnormal. It is preventable.

mydoctortells: Note

The vaginal opening is not open like a round hollow space
O or nostril. The vagina is potential space. The walls of vagina touch each other just as the palms of both hands when brought together as in ‘Namaste’ touch each other.

The vaginal opening gets clamped tight as a reflex action in anticipation of pain. It is like you shutting your mouth tight. If someone were to force feed you, the lips will pain and may bleed too.

Bleeding Pain First Sex: Causes See Pictures

Small animated picture showing how vaginismus shuts vaginal opening


Animated big picture showing exact mechanism of vaginismus.


Consequences of vaginismus

Click to see the consequences of Vaginismus.
Vaginismus does not merely cause pain and/or bleeding during first sex. It has significant consequences that baffle the couple and put blame on one or the other.

Bleeding Pain First Sex: Treatment

Click here to find

1. How to do sex without bleeding and pain?


2. Suhagarat first night honey moon newly wed how to insert penis in vagina


VaginismusVAGINAL OPENINGVagina is not open. The muscles around the opening of vagina go into involuntary spasm and the entrance to vagina gets blocked. This causes pain and bleeding or leads to unconsummated sex can cause painful first sex

When the penis is thrust forcefully it leads to pain and bleeding.

Prevention of pain and bleeding during first sex

Pain and bleeding during first sex are often avoidable.
To avoid pain and bleeding during sex major role is played by

  1. proper knowledge about sex,(how to insert penis in vagina) especially of first sexual intercourse,
    (Suhagarat Honeymoon first sex) )
  2. bonding and intimacy with partner
  3. being comfortable about one’s own private parts.

For VaginismusVaginismus PictureSee animated picture showing vaginismus in action – mechanism, treatment, animated pictures click here


Related articles

VaginismusUnconsummated Sex Penis is unable to enter in vagina during sexual intercourse. This causes unconsummated marriage is the principal cause of unconsummated sex.
Proper sex educationSuhagratWhat not to do during suhagrat? can prevent pain and bleeding during first sex.

To see educational videoSex Education VideoYou don’t have to use any medicine supplements for honeymoon if you understand this educational video. It is purposely made to prevent abuse of Viagra on first sex click here.

You must be 18 or above years of age to see this video

Further Reading Acknowledgement:

Dr. (Mr.) Ashok Koparday

M.B.B.S., F.C.S.E.P. (International)
Accreditation: M.M.C. of India
Ex. Teaching Faculty

Seth G. S. Medical College

King Edward Memorial
K. E. M. Hospital
Grant Medical College
Sir J. J. Group of Hospitals,
University of Mumbai


Psycho-Sexual Medicine
Marriage counselor

Member: Indian Medical Association
Fellow: Council of Sex Education & Parenthood (International)

Published by Ashok Koparday
Sexual Health Best World Class Premier Treatment Center
Samadhan India

Contact 8 pm ONLY for appointment with
Consultant in Sexual Medicine
Telephone: 02225060061
Mobile: +91 9867788877
Email: ask[@]mydoctortells[dot]com


License: CC-BY-NC-SA-4.0 Attribution as given here:
By Ashok Koparday with a link to

About Author

Ashok Koparday, Sexologist and Marriage Counselor, Sex Therapist, Accredited

Best Sexologist Treatment Mumbai Sex Doctor Sex Problem Sexual Dysfunctions Cure Mumbai Ghatkopar East, India Sex Therapist Marriage Counselor Sexual Health Best World Class Premier Treatment Samadhan India Medical Director Best Treatment World Class Premier Center Samadhan India + Ashok Koparday Linkedin | Facebook | Google + Twitter | YouTube



October 20, 2013 at 3:02 am

please send me the vidio which guide me the proper way of sex at first night to avoid pain and extra bleeding.


October 4, 2013 at 2:44 pm

bleeding during first time is a sign of virginity?? and I was married and we had sex and he was discharged 5 times inside .. and after that first day we got separation due to his external affairs that day when we had sex I was bleed but now m getting marry again and that’s arranged.. he doesn’t know about my first marriage.. and I love him don’t wanna loose him please tell me would he know that I am not virgin??

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