Question

Hello Dr,

i am 24 year old male. And i am not doing any sex activity till now but always my cock going up and bent whatever i see any girl or not as well as when i sleep my cock become bent and in morning my underwear become wet due to some crystal material. My cock upper cover is completed goes down .

Can this something wrong in me or what to do to remove this habit.

Reply
Hello Dr,

i am 24 year old male
RIGHT AGE FOR MARRIAGE.
And i am not doing any sex activity till now
ABSTINENCE KEEPS YOU SAFE
but always my cock going up and bent whatever i see any girl NATURAL MALE SEXUAL RESPONSE or not as well as when i sleep NOCTURNAL PENILE TUMESCENCE IS SIGN OF HEALTHY PENILE ERECTILE FUNCTION my cock become bent and in morning my underwear become wet due
WET DREAMS IS NORMAL OUT LET FOR SEMEN WHEN A PERSON IS NOT HAVING SEX
to some crystal material. My cock upper cover is completed goes down .

DOES IT MEAN IT COMPLETELY COVERS OR DOES IT MEAN IT COMPLETELY EXPOSES THE GLANS (LAST TIP PART) PENIS?

Can this something wrong in me
WRONG IF YOU DO NOT GET CORRECT SCIENTIFIC KNOWLEDGE
or what to do to remove this habit.
HABIT OF MASTURBATION, IF YOU MEAN THAT, IS HEALTHY AND PROVIDES SAFE OUTLET TO SEXUAL DESIRE INDUCED SEMEN PRODUCTION. MASTURBATION NEVER CAUSES ANY HARM WHATSOEVER TO ANY ONE EVEN IF YOU THINK YOU HAVE DONE IN EXCESS OR BEGAN AT EARLY AGE. MASTURBATION PREVENTS YOU FROM IMMORAL SEX, SEXUALLY TRANSMITTED INFECTIONS AND SOCIAL STIGMA DUE TO SEXUAL MISBEHAVIOR WITH SOME GIRL

Please let me know if you have any additional questions or issues.
Best regards,
Dr. Ashok Koparday
Consultant Sex, Marriage, Relationships
Counselor and Therapist

GIRSH KENOY – PEGNANCY DATES -CLOSER

Pre-Marital Workshop

A specially designed workshop for
Engaged,

To Be Married,
Recently Married,
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Learn all about

• Roles and Expectations of Marriage
• Love and Intimacy
• Children and Family
• Finances
• Conflict Handling
• Communication Gap

Relationship Marriage Counseling Premarital Workshop
Date:  Sunday, January 11, 2009
Venue:  Vinita Samaj Hall, Veer Savarkar Marg,

Shivaji Park, Dadar West, Mumbai, India IN

PREMARITAL WORKSHOP by allianceindia.co.in

UPDATE

(Remember: February 22, 2009 Sunday. Find more at the allianceindia ) PREMARITAL WORKSHOP covers important and intimate topics, which neither school teaches you nor parents.

Many marriages begin these days with personals followed by dating. Now, you have a god sent opportunity to benefit from experts.

PURPOSE: STAY JOYOUSLY MARRIED

If you have missed the PREMARITAL WORKSHOP of January 2009 held at Dadar, Mumbai, you have good news. You can jump in for the second PREMARITAL WORKSHOP of this year by allianceindia on 22 February, 2009, Sunday.

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Live happy, Stay happy,

Dr. Ashok Koparday

 http://mydoctortells.com/save-your-marriage-story/ that saves marriage of a couple ready for separation and divorce fascinated me. 

Counseling, Advice, or Guidance for Healthy Marriage is not useless. It is used less.

Preparing for divorce or preparing for healthy marriage?

Needless to say that divorce rates, divorce record, divorce laws, divorce problems are increasing.   Divorce, that too, fast divorce, easy divorce even on line divorce (you only heard about on line dating) is being chosen as a quick fix to resolve marriage conflict. How to save my marriage or marriage guidance is not sought when couples have marriage problems.

We have divorce attorney, structured divorce laws, divorce lawyers, marriage or family courts, but do we have marriage counselors or institutions teaching intimacy and skills of making love, a map or guide book to show the path to live harmoniously, happily married for ever? It is funny that we are well prepared (by various means) for eventual divorce, but ill prepared for healthy marriage. 

Prepare for healthy marriage

Learn to tune in, be in harmony, express intimacy, have lively rapport, resolve irritating matters, hold hands despite differences, form robust bonding, feel secure, get the sense of belonging in your married relationship. To enrich your marriage seek out marriage counselors and learn from them when you are in teens.

Why marry, if you do not care to learn how to tie the emotional stings in a loving robust bond? Why waste money and energy; why spend precious time and invest your life when you do not care to learn the art of living harmoniously for happy marriage? Do you know how much you invest in a relationship? You were not born with the knowledge of driving a car, or flying a plane. Even walking and talking had to be taught to you. Why not learn skills of bonding, art of healing strained relationships so that your life is rich and fulfilling?

Think!

One important reason for troubled marriages is not knowing intimacy skills. It is a basic primer. Marriage guidance is useful, before and after marriage, just as guidance is useful to learn cooking How dare you drive without knowing basics of driving? Driving involves complex things like changing gears, using your hands to steer, your feet are alert and know when to push and how much, eyes are riveted on the road. Yet you are so skilled that you do all this effortlessly and even manage to talk with your daughter or laugh with your son while driving. I am sure I have driven my point clearly. 

If you are a rational,  reasonable person you definitely know what to do to avoid trouble, what to do when in trouble. If you have flaring upper respiratory tract infection then you take steps to restore health and do not walk towards symmetry, do you? Similarly I am sure you know it is important to seek marriage guidance or counseling before and after marriage. You would not rush to divorce lawyer or divorce attorney only if you knew how to manage conflicts, restore health and happiness in marriage.

While dealing with Marriage Conflicts you push your troubles under the carpet, or medically speaking push your hurt, resentment underneath your conscious awareness. This is because you do not know any other way of dealing with marriage conflicts. You are ashamed to bring it out in public. Dating followed by Mating , Love, Marriage and eventual Divorce need not be anticipated module for our generation.

So, thou shall not

• Do not push hurt, resentment inside, underneath your conscious awareness or
• rush to seek separation or divorce or
• become an alcoholic or workaholic .

The best and sensible way is to go to marriage counselor if your marriage is on the rocks. 

I am sure you would like to learn how to deal with difficulties in marriage. Communication and Management, Leadership, Motivational training is offered to Corporate Executives. Similarly seek out planned training programs to have fulfilling married life.

Cooking, Dancing require certain skills so does happy marriage.

Without learning you cannot read and write.
without learning you cannot have healthy happy marriage.

Get a rule book on how to maintain life long partnership. Joys and sorrows are inevitable whether you are married, single or divorced. Learn how to share joys and sorrows in married relationship. Learn how to express love, respect, care. Learn skills of intimacy, art of making love.

If you are marrying do what it takes to experience quality rich family life.

Let there be a gap of not less than 6 months between engagement and marriage, even if it is love marriage.
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Why should they meet often before marriage?
TO FAMILIARIZE To know each other better as well as to intimately know each others family members.

The boy and the girl thus gather first hand knowledge about one another and about their family members.

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TO DISCOVER Given such an opportunity both can let their instincts (of judgment) be at work. Thus, they discover their quirks, likes, dislikes, prejudices, personality traits, mannerisms and lifestyle. EACH WORD IS IMPORTANT. You then know what you are in for, thus you can be mentally prepared for the anticipated changes.  Reconnaissance is a word frequently used by military for such preparatory minute observations. The fear parents have is not of meeting before marriage, but mating before marriage.
Parents who thus guard, are guardians.

Especially the girl’s parents.

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TO BE WELL PREPARED You get time to learn things that may be considered important prerequisite by the boy’s family members. Example, she has Masters in Business Administration and is currently Chief Manager of HRD of a company. The family members consider ‘knowing to cook well’ as important, more so because they are likely to settle abroad.
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TO KICK OUT UNDESIRABLE HABITS Similarly, if the girl considers smoking and booze obnoxious, intolerable, then this time before marriage is the best time to effectively take corrective steps to quit smoking and drinking. At this juncture before marriage the boy as well as the girl has youth, courage, willingness more important romantic love to learn whatever that may be necessary.
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MEETINGS BEFORE MARRIAGE HELP BUILD STRONG FOUNDATION FOR LONG LASTING MARRIED LIFE.
IT STRENGTHENS MUTUAL BONDING, THAT ENABLES BETTER ADJUSTMENTS WHILE FACING DIFFICULTIES THAT ARE INEVITABLE OR DEALING WITH TRAITS THAT ARE HEARTILY DISLIKED. IN THIS WAY PREMARRIAGE MEETINGS GENERATE THE NOBLEST QUALITY OF SACRIFICE FOR EACH SINCE IT IS FOUNDED ON UNDERSTANDING, TRUST, CARE, CONCERN AND LOVE.

(Read or hear the short story “The Gift of The Maggi” by O. Henry)
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TO ENABLE SMOOTH TRANSITION The premarital anxiety
that is widely prevalent and gets dramatically reduced.
This time is for gelling in, it is enables smooth transition
from the unmarried state to the [highly responsible and difficult]
married state. Time together facilitates smooth harmonious living.
The romantic love that permeates them is verily foundation for the entire edifice of married life. It truly helps bonding.
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TO SAFEGUARD AGAINST TREACHERY If you have not had time to investigate the
particulars of qualification, salary, assets and liabilities as claimed by the boy,
the premarriage meetings allows you time to check about the boy’s background so that you do not get conned.

UNDERSTANDING THE TRADITIONAL ARRANGED MARRIAGE IN INDIAN ETHOS
In the traditional Indian marriage the always girl leaves her home
for good and goes to stay with the boy’s family.
The members of the family consist at least his parents and brothers and sisters.
It is the girl who has to spend her entire life with entirely different set of people, so knowing them before marriage is necessary.
What would happen if they do not meet frequently as you say?
It is seen that even after 3 years, 8 years, 13 years, 18 years or 23 years of marriage the daughter in law has to go through (most often) continuous torrent of unbearable stress, which is not uncommon, and usually manifests as illness. Where is the joy or harmony in relationships?
How would you sum up the reasons for premarriage meetings?
SUMMARY
By frequent visits to his home the girl (fiancee) comes to know the details of the personality traits of the people with whom she would be closely related for the rest of her life. Similarly, vice versa, the parents get to know the shades of boys/girls personality, abilities, his/her likes dislikes and thus decide what to expect from him/her. Knowing the expectations, likes and dislikes of these closest relatives of the boy help you decide the RELATIONSHIP SKILLS with which you ought to operate.
You come to know if you can and how much you can adjust.

Premarriage meetings enables an individual time for observation of human nature, their attitudes and beliefs.

Premarriage meetings, empowered with the deft use of Relationship Skills, paves way for happy, long lasting, healthy Family Life.

The author is a Marriage Counselor

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