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Dr. Ashok Koparday
Dr. Hetal Gosalia

Dr. Ashok Koparday | Dr. Hetal Gosalia

Date last updated: April 08, 2020

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How to insert penis in vagina Top Female Sexologist Dr. Hetal Gosalia - HONEYMOON English FIRST SEX Trusted for 20 years & more Erectile Dysfunction Treatment in Mumbai ED doctor Top Sexologist in Mumbai Dr. Ashok Koparday Samadhan Health Studio | Center of Excellence

How to insert penis in vagina FIRST SEX -Top Female Sexologist Dr. Hetal Gosalia

By TOP SEXOLOGIST in Mumbai Dr. Ashok Koparday

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TOP FEMALE SEXOLOGIST, Mumbai Dr. Hetal Gosalia

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Vaginismus Treatment

By Senior Sexologist of India, Dr. Ashok Koparday
Top Female Sexologist Counselor Dr. Hetal Gosalia

15 Tips to bring back joy in your marriage.

Best Sexual Health Treatment Clinic in Mumbai, Samadhan Health Studio, Center of Excellence

Which doctor to visit for the treatment of vaginismus?

as well as the cooperation and commitment of the couple.

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Vaginismus MEANING

Vaginismus is involuntary contraction of the pubococcygeus muscles at the time of insertion of penis. Forcible insertion of penis, as a result, gives rise to pain (Dyspareunia). The consequence: There is no insertion of penis in vagina during coitus. This is called unconsummated sex or unconsummated marriage. Some couples only turn up for treatment because they want pregnancy.


Vaginismus 3 pictures

Click to download 1. SMALL and
2. BIG picture, both animated, depicting vaginismus in action. Pictures show you EXACTLY what is happening.
This 3. picture gives analogy of railway going through a tunnel

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Vaginismus SYMPTOMS

1. Pain at attempt of insertion of penis (Dyspareunia). The pain ranges from mild as discomfort at insertion to severe tearing pain.
2. Bleeding during First Sex. Often forcible sex in the presence of vaginismus causes results in bleeding.
3. Anxiety related to sex in the female.
4. Surprisingly, in India, vaginismus presents as Erectile Dysfunction and/or Premature Ejaculation in the male.
I have discussed this here

This may appear paradoxical, but in India, especially when the groom has self-doubt he concludes that the penis is not going in because of premature ejaculation or because of erectile dysfunction. Self-doubt is often present in innumerable boys before marriage.
Self-doubt occurs due to
inexperience or
bad sexual experience in the past or because of
the feeling of inadequacy about the size of his penis or
inadequacy arising due to rapid discharge.
or myths related to masturbation, nightfall, loss of vital semen virya
Here, the male partner wrongly believes HE HAS PROBLEM.
It never occurs to him that there could be the problem in the entrance of the vagina.

wrong diagnosis erectile dysfunction newlywed

5. Pregnancy gets delayed

6. Misunderstandings – Relationship Discords – Divorce
Often due to sex taboo, neither the boy nor the girl goes for treatment. Worse. They may land up in the hands of a quack.
Misunderstandings multiply in response to avoidance of sex.
Feeling of defeat and depression.

May lead to divorce.

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Dyspareunia and Vaginismus

Dyspareunia is a medical term for difficulty and painful sexual intercourse. One of the causes of dyspareunia in newlywed is vaginismus.


Vaginismus CAUSES

Unfortunately, vaginismus is not uncommon in India.
Most girls who experience vaginismus have fear about the penetration of penis.
The fear of pain and bleeding is ubiquitous. Often this girl has heard from her friend or relative, “Initially, it is painful. Then, later on, it becomes okay.”
When a girl it told sex is painful and when she anticipates pain, will there not be a reflex contraction as a means of protection?
In India where there is orthodox socio-cultural upbringing even touching “private” part is shunned. Talking about “naughty” things is taboo for good girls.
Good girls are defined as those who do not talk about sex or do “those kinds of things”.
Insertion of finger, tampon, or any object and per speculum or per vaginal examination by a doctor can be difficult, painful or impossible due to vaginismus.


Vaginismus Treatment @ HOME

Rohan is married to Smita, who is a corporate executive. Smita is understanding and adjustable.
Rohan believes he has premature ejaculation and now erectile dysfunction. On the sly, he has tried various treatments with different doctors including well-known urologists. He is crestfallen as all the treatments invariably failed. Rohan pursued his treatment on and off for over two years without confiding in Smita. Smita herself visited two Gynecologists. She was given a clean bill and told not to worry.
To hide his shame Rohan became a workaholic. Both were not able to make out, given that they had only weekends to try.
Simita has been imploring Rohan to seek treatment. After two years her frustration crossed limits.
It was in such a moment of crisis when marriage was in doldrums they both met an experienced sex therapist.
Here the condition took a happy turn. That’s called arriving at bliss.

If a girl learns to use tampons for periods (menses) instead of sanitary napkins it will act as an effective preventive measure for vaginismus.
Unfortunately, tampons do not do well in the market in India and several countries where even touching private parts is shunned.

She can masturbate and explore her private parts even when alone.
Most of the times visit to a Gynecologist does not help.


Vaginismus IS IT CURABLE?

There are definite methods by which this anxiety leading to vaginismus can be cured.
The results are excellent with the guidance of competent experienced Sex Therapist.
If urologist, gynecologist, sexologist or some doctor incompetently handles the treatment of vaginismus, as they very often do, the situation becomes complicated and frustrating. In spite of this, an experienced sex therapist can do wonders.
Cooperation and commitment of both partners make all the difference in treatment outcome.


How to get Pregnant with Vaginismus

Often the couple is married for over 3 years when they visit me. There desire for pregnancy has reached the zenith. Attempts at overcoming vaginismus have left them frustrated.
When the frustrated couple is more eager to get pregnant than solve the issue of vaginismus or unconsummated sex there is still a SOLUTION.

Please know that PREGNANCY IS POSSIBLE in spite of vaginismus even when the marriage is unconsummated.

The semen has to come in contact with the vagina. This is all that is required. Penis acts as a dropper to deposit semen in the vagina. The same can be done by simple means at home. Use a finger, an ink dropper, a spoon or an empty syringe (without needle) to scoop semen and bring it at the opening of the vagina.




Diagnosis, Investigations and Medicines

There are no investigative tools or diagnostic laboratory tests for vaginismus.
Attentive history taking by an expert is enough to give a conclusive diagnosis of vaginismus.
I have never ever had to do per vaginal examination.
The only medicines that may be required are a lubricant and PDE5 inhibitor tablet (like Viagra ©).



I have not required dilators or any kit for the treatment of Vaginismus.
A surgical procedure called Fenton’s operation was previously advocated to broaden the vaginal introitus.
This is unnecessary or rather useless.

Vaginismus PDF

Download and give this to your spouse.
Click here to download PDF file of Vaginismus Treatment.



Vaginismus Cure 11 PRACTICAL STEPS

Vaginismus Cure: Doctor’s Role is Crucial

  1. Psycho-Sexual Therapeutic Counseling is of paramount importance in the treatment of Vaginismus.
  2. If necessary KY Lubricating jelly or Lignox 2% cream can be used.
  3. She can practice inserting finger in vagina in privacy either when alone or with partner.
  4. As a part of therapy, there has to be NO attempt at the insertion of penis in the vagina. (have you noticed I use the word ‘insertion’, not ‘penetration’.)
    Reason: Every single unsuccessful attempt at insertion brings the couple several steps back in the treatment procedure.
  5. Sex Joy Therapy is advised. The couple engages in wholesome, full-fledged, ecstatic sexual intimacy. The focus is on her pleasure.
    Shamelessly, they indulge in any form of erotic sexual pleasuring (except insertion of penis in vagina).
    (See the four chapters on Female Satisfaction.)
    She can use her pet masturbatory method and indulge in her private sexual fantasy that arouses her.
  6. She is enabled to orgasm.
  7. At the height of sexual excitement, she inserts a finger in vaginal introitus or asks him to gently insert a finger.
    At the peak of sexual arousal there is flood of endorphins because of which body’s ‘pain’ threshold, ‘hate’, and ‘disgust’ threshold rises.
  8. When one finger insertion happens with ease, then two finger insertion is attempted.
  9. After series of such sex play, she becomes confident of insertion of penis.
  10. In a sex position that is advised by the doctor or preferred by her the next step is begun.
    She holds the erect penis and directs it at the entrance of vagina.
  11. The insertion of penis in vagina is accomplished.
    To arrive at 10. several attempts may be required before the penis is able to glide in smoothly.



Vaginismus is curable. Vaginismus treatment becomes quicker and easier with expert medical guidance from a competent Sex Therapist.


Unable to insert penis in vagina

By Dr. Ashok Koparday & Dr. Hetal Gosalia

QUESTION: You asked

Dear Sir/ Madam, I am 26 yrs unmarried girl, I am in relation with my boyfriend for last 5 yrs. we had oral sex but i feel fear when ever my boy friend try to insert his penis into my vegina Please help me out I cannot tel anybody for the same. this thing is being hurdle in my relation. as i am about to get married with him soon & he thinks that i will not be able to let him do after marriage also. please reply me ASAP. Thanks.


Reply: (sent in email) (Name – “Sorry. Our privacy policy is very strict”.)
Be comfortable with your own private parts.
Touch the vulva often, as during bath or in the privacy of your bedroom.
If you are accustomed to masturbation I encourage you to do clitoral self-stimulation.

During self-pleasuring when you are about to climax you can attempt to insert one finger into the vagina.
If you can already do this use two fingers.

During sexual arousal, if your finger can glide in the vagina you will realize the wetness and ease.

Do the same steps with your partner. Or have him stimulate you.
Once you are comfortable with your own or his finger gliding in you will have ease of penis insertion.

When with partner spend time touching, caressing his private parts.
Learn geography.

Your inhibitions ought to melt away.

The greatest way to rule over a man is by pleasing his tool

Women may be turned off by the sight of the penis.

However, man’s ego and pleasure are heavily connected with the penis.

He likes the female partner to love and like the penis.

Pleasuring by stimulating penis with hand or mouth is what most men prefer.

Once you are uninhibited and shameless, two finger insertion is smooth, then at the height of sexual arousal, you will experience the penis gliding in the vagina.

Moment to celebrate!

For more details  see chapters on female satisfaction at

If you have additional queries you may ask by hitting on reply on the same email.

You can also thank us.
Dr. Hetal Gosalia
Female Sexologist India
Happiness doctor,
Dr. Ashok Koparday
Ex Teaching Faculty
KEM & JJ Hospital
University of Mumbai
Samadhan Health Studio, India
Center of Excellence



Vaginismus Treatment CONCLUSION

Vaginismus is not uncommon. The involuntary spasm of vaginal introitus makes the passage of penis into vagina painful. This results in unconsummated marriage. That is penis is not able to go into vagina after marriage.
90% of the times the boy due to his weak erections believes he is the root cause. Treatment for premature ejaculation and erectile dysfunction does not solve this problem. Almost always expert guidance of an experienced sex therapist ir required for solving this delicate problem of intimacy. Don’t delay consulting aa sexologist if you experience pain or difficulty in sex after marriage. Time is precious. Don’t let relationship go sour. Claim your marital bliss. There is DEFINITE cure for your difficulty.


References: Vaginismus Treatment



SEX How to insert penis in vagina

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Vaginismus DOCTOR


Unable to insert penis in vagina

By Dr. Ashok Koparday & Dr. Hetal Gosalia

Dr. (Mr.) Ashok Koparday
M.B.B.S., F.C.S.E.P. (International)
Accreditation: M.M.C. of India
Ex. Teaching Faculty
Seth G. S. Medical College
King Edward Memorial
K. E. M. Hospital

Grant Medical College
Sir J. J. Group of Hospitals ,
University of Mumbai
Dr. Ashok Koparday is practicing over 20 years as
Consultant in Psycho-Sexual Medicine &
Marriage counselor
Member: Indian Medical Association
Fellow: Council of Sex Education & Parenthood (International)
Ashok Koparday
Senior Sexologist (Experience 20 years)
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Rated 5 out of 5 Based on 118  Google reviews

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A1, Namdeep, Barrister Nath Pai Road,
Near Vikrant Circle, Barrister Nath Pai Nagar,

Ghatkopar East ,
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Date published: November 10, 2016
Date created: November 10, 2016


Unable to insert penis in vagina

By Dr. Ashok Koparday & Dr. Hetal Gosalia

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